I just went on this tirade about me and someone, but thought I'd stop and delete that because this blog is so not about the nature of our relationship.
Back to the subject at hand. I wonder, why does a mediocre conversation lead to certain thoughts? Is it that I have more feelings than I want to admit about this person? Is it the fact that I miss the "newness" of a potential relationship? Is it that on occasion, being the Cancer that I am, I fantasize about the possibilities of marriage (as I do with all the men who have come into my life since 1995)? Is it that there's just so much mystery between the two of us that I'm curious as to what could've possibly been?
Sadly, there are other weird thoughts going on. I've been listening to Raheem Devaughn and have just been in a sexual haze. Not that I necessarily want to have sex with someone but more so I truly think I'm just starved for romance. And not any romance, I'm referring to that rare spontaneous romance. The type of romance that has you so out of the loop that when anything happens you can't help but enjoy it, and you cry because you're so overwhelmed with joy. I'm talking about that, take you to dinner and have your favorite R&B singer sing to you (and if he doesn't "have it like that" have the band say your name and dedicate your favorite R&B song to you). I'm talking about that every hour on the hour flower delivery to your office (and not a bunch of flowers, but one individual flower) until you have a full bouquet to take home at the end of the day, or leave on your desk and remind you of that special someone that sent them. I'm talking about coming home to a hot bath tub full of bubbles, and rose petals, decorated by beautifully fragrant candles because your man wants to give you a bath. I'm talking about the random foot massage, and the random let me wash your hair, and the random I'm hungry let me go down on you head. I'm talking about being the "Customer" (as Raheem sings)
I think I'm starved for that right now. Longevity in a relationship is great, but all the spice can't be from arguments, and extended periods away from each other. It's about Romance and sizzle. Ok, I think my rant it done (and it only took me 3 hours to write).
Back to the subject at hand. I wonder, why does a mediocre conversation lead to certain thoughts? Is it that I have more feelings than I want to admit about this person? Is it the fact that I miss the "newness" of a potential relationship? Is it that on occasion, being the Cancer that I am, I fantasize about the possibilities of marriage (as I do with all the men who have come into my life since 1995)? Is it that there's just so much mystery between the two of us that I'm curious as to what could've possibly been?
Sadly, there are other weird thoughts going on. I've been listening to Raheem Devaughn and have just been in a sexual haze. Not that I necessarily want to have sex with someone but more so I truly think I'm just starved for romance. And not any romance, I'm referring to that rare spontaneous romance. The type of romance that has you so out of the loop that when anything happens you can't help but enjoy it, and you cry because you're so overwhelmed with joy. I'm talking about that, take you to dinner and have your favorite R&B singer sing to you (and if he doesn't "have it like that" have the band say your name and dedicate your favorite R&B song to you). I'm talking about that every hour on the hour flower delivery to your office (and not a bunch of flowers, but one individual flower) until you have a full bouquet to take home at the end of the day, or leave on your desk and remind you of that special someone that sent them. I'm talking about coming home to a hot bath tub full of bubbles, and rose petals, decorated by beautifully fragrant candles because your man wants to give you a bath. I'm talking about the random foot massage, and the random let me wash your hair, and the random I'm hungry let me go down on you head. I'm talking about being the "Customer" (as Raheem sings)
I think I'm starved for that right now. Longevity in a relationship is great, but all the spice can't be from arguments, and extended periods away from each other. It's about Romance and sizzle. Ok, I think my rant it done (and it only took me 3 hours to write).
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